Veteran writer reflects on childhood memories, family dynamics, and lasting regrets over his late mother’s illness and passing.
ISLAMABAD: Renowned Pakistani writer and producer Khalil ur Rehman Qamar has shared a deeply personal account of why he could not form a strong emotional bond with his mother, offering rare insight into his childhood struggles and family relationships.
Speaking during a recent interview with Dr. Areej Zulfiqar, Qamar reflected on his early years, marked by both affection and emotional distance. Despite acknowledging a few cherished memories, he admitted that his connection with his mother remained limited.
Recalling one such moment, Qamar described how his mother once went out of her way to fulfill his wish of eating fresh goat liver during Eid ul Adha. Coming from a middle-class background, such meals were rare, but when the meat from their sacrificed goat turned out to be spoiled, his mother arranged another goat to ensure he could enjoy the dish.
However, he said these gestures were overshadowed by a different dynamic at home. Qamar revealed that he felt closer to his father, even though their relationship was strict and often harsh. As a young student who began writing and getting published in newspapers at just 12, he faced opposition from his father, who disapproved of his literary pursuits.
According to Qamar, his mother would often inform his father about his writing activities, which led to frequent punishments. This created emotional distance between him and his mother, preventing a deeper bond from forming during his formative years.
The situation worsened when his mother was diagnosed with cancer when he was just 15. Her prolonged illness and eventual passing when he was 18 left him with limited time and memories to build a meaningful relationship. He expressed regret over not being able to care for her during her final years.
Reflecting on the loss, Qamar noted that people often take their parents for granted, assuming they will always be there. It is only after their passing, he said, that the depth of the loss truly becomes clear. Unlike many others, he added, he carries fewer memories of his mother and more of his father.
Qamar, known for iconic dramas such as Mere Paas Tum Ho, Pyare Afzal, and Sadqay Tumhare, continues to be a significant voice in Pakistan’s television industry. His recent project has also received critical acclaim, further cementing his legacy as a storyteller who often draws from deeply personal experiences.
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